Helpless turned into hope

When you have a child who you can't figure out how to help. His teachers say there is something wrong, the psychologist says he has ADHD tendencies, he doesn't get concepts that are age appropriate. You sit on the floor crying while he is throwing a tantrum because his world is stressing him out and you are lost. You cry to your husband and say he needs help but you don't want to medicate him. He can throw a baseball with an amazing arm, is probably the 2nd best hitter on the team, but can't figure out where to go with the ball because he can't understand cause and effect. You feel led to call the psychiatrist, but you can't quite bring yourself to do it. When you see his report card and it's constantly saying 'needs improvement' on all his self control skill sets you feel like a failure.

You feel like you failed as a mom. How can you possibly take care of 3 others when you can't help this child who is extremely impulsive navigate the overstimulating world around him and not be labeled as "that mom who can't control her kid"? They were right, I couldn't control my kid, but it's not for lack of trying or because HE wanted to feel so out of control all the time.

This was me, over 2 years ago. The pediatrician was pushing me to call the psychiatrist and I was dragging my feet. I didn't know why, but God did. He had another plan for us! He presented us with these supplements just when we had no where else to turn. Through all the nay-sayers, we did what was best for our family. We chose something natural that the pediatrician supports. She was amazed yesterday at his well check with is progress and said "Keep it up! It's clearly working!"


It's my mission to give this gift to as many families as possible. I'm so thankful someone shared with me!!

Hope

Well I have been working on this blog post for quite some time. I have written it and deleted it several times out of fear. Fear of rejection. Fear of the backlash on Jeff and I…and even Peyton, our sweet 9 yr old boy this post is about. Fear that I won’t be able to write what I am really thinking so that people can understand and therefore justify our decision (even though our choices should only matter to us). Then I tell myself I’m being silly and it’s not really that big of a deal. Get a grip Tanya …it’s not really as big as you are making it. But you see, to me it IS! It has been life changing for this momma of 4 who always strives for perfection (to a fault), for our precious boy, and for our family as a whole.

Many know that Peyton has ADHD. Something that again, might not seem like that big of a deal to many, but when it disrupts every aspect of that child’s life as well as the lives of everyone else in the family, it is!

From the time he was 3 we knew something was definitely different. Like many parents out there, we lived in denial for so long. We kept thinking, he’s a boy, he will grow out it. He didn’t. When he was 5 we had him evaluated and even though they knew “something was wrong” they couldn’t quite put their finger on what it was.  “ADHD tendencies and sensory issues” was what they gave us. Needless to say we were left with more questions than answers. What does that mean? Will he outgrow it? Where do we go from here? Why won’t you provide him with services –just because you don’t have a definitive diagnosis? So again, we lived in denial and just dealt with it the best way we knew how.

How did that work? Not so well! We were left scrambling daily to figure out how to deal with this child that gave us a run for our money EVERYDAY, ALL DAY! We went back and forth between ourselves, “Can he control it?” “Is he just acting out?” “Do we just need to be stricter with him?” “Where did we go wrong?”. Feeling every step of the way that we were failing him somehow. We talked to lots of doctors and some believed, but many didn’t listen. They wouldn’t give me the time of day and just said he was being a boy or there was nothing that could be done until he started struggling in school. But what about how much he is struggling at home? What about the days filled with tears because I just couldn’t understand my child and didn’t know how to help him? I remember being filled with anger, frustration, annoyance, and exhaustion because I felt unheard and was made to feel like I was a crazy mom who just needed to provide more consequences for her child.

As the years went by and we added more children to our family and I became more and more stressed out trying to manage a newborn, a 1 yr old, a 2 yr old, and a 5.5 yr old with ADHD, I quickly realized that something had to change. We couldn’t go on living with what was the equivalent of 3 toddlers and a baby in the house. He needed help as much as we wanted him to get help. We tossed around lots of things with the pediatricians, got phone numbers for psychologists, went as far as emailing one of them, but just could never bring ourselves to follow through. Some may call me lazy or a bad mom, but I know God kept holding me back for a reason. He knew there was another answer out there and that these drs and the possibility of meds just wasn’t one of them.

As with anything there are varying degrees of ADHD and what that looks like for every child, but the gist of it is they are very impulsive, are the first to get excited and wound up, lack the ability to stay focused for periods of time to complete a task, get very upset when their routine is broken or things are out of place, can’t follow multi-step directions, and just plain lack self-control in a lot of areas of their life. This was Peyton to a “T”.

He was getting Needs Improvement on his behavior skills – self-control, follows directions, works independently, is respectful, isn’t disruptive, etc. We knew it was time to do something!

After much research into the same health supplements that were helping Jeff lose weight and become healthier, we started giving him a capful of our 22 super fruit juice and our mental focus and clarity supplement. In 6 months, he went from getting Needs Improvement to Outstandings! He learned how to pitch in baseball (something he would have never been able to do because it was too many things going on at one time), he can now follow multi-step directions, is under control of his actions, much calmer… He has won 2 school wide awards for showing respect and being a responsible student. It has been so fun to watch him blossom into the boy he is today!

It has been such a blessing not only to him, but to our family as well. We are ecstatic to have found something that is natural and still allows him to be Peyton! I share this with the hope that some other parent going through this same thing, can find hope and the answers they too are looking for!

Random sentences

Peyton just finished up an amazing baseball season! They made the championship playoff game. He enjoyed being the catcher and in the infield the most.

Parker and Piper are about to start soccer. This will be the first time they have ever done an organized sport.

Paxton is adjusting to school pretty well. Never got good "first day of school pics" from him.

We are enjoying fall and playing in the leaves.

My Nana is going to start watching the kids while I go to work a few times a month. I'm excited for the kids to get to spend some time with their great grandmother.

I just got back from a trip to Puerto Rico for my health and wellness company! Had an amazing time learning and building friendships. Sad to leave 80 degree weather and flip flops to come back to 30's and boots!

Love that I get to travel the world, work from the beach, and learn how to better inspire others to give themselves the gift of health. Our company came out with a brand new product that's going to be released Nov 1st and a brand new app!!

NOT me week

It’s been a long time since I have posted a NOT Me post…This week has been a LONG week!

It all started off so well! Peyton did NOT drag his feet so badly that he did NOT miss the bus! I did NOT pick up the pieces for him and rush them all into the car to get him to school on time! I am NOT regretting that decision, because that did NOT backfire on me the rest of the week! He would NEVER take advantage and try to pull that stunt again!

After that whole debacle, I did NOT drop 32 ounces of liquid gold all over my dining room floor (Dunkin Donuts Iced Tea). After I got done NOT crying over spilt Iced Tea, I did NOT walk into the Living Room to find a 5 foot, black, Crayola masterpiece all over the hardwood floors. No, Paxton would NEVER do something like that! We do NOT own stock in Magic Erasers (we don’t actually, but should).

Paxton is the perfect little 3 yr old; he would NEVER finger paint with baby powder, hop into the driver’s seat of my van when asked to get in his seat, throw a half full juice box onto the floor that he was finished with, hop into my washer in the 30 seconds it took me to go to the top of the stairs to break up an argument, take his clothes and diaper off because he didn’t want to wear what you put on him…NO NEVER!

Tuesday started so much better! Peyton did NOT make it out to the bus in the nick of time! Paxton did NOT go up and hide in his room saying he was not going to school! He did NOT take every blanket out of his drawer trying to find the perfect one! I was NOT late getting him to school because of his shenanigans!  While making dinner, Paxton did NOT color yet another masterpiece! Jeff did NOT question why I “let” that happen again…umm, I was making dinner and wasn't on top of this kid that I should be able to trust just a little!

Wednesday was a blast! Peyton most definitely was NOT finally running on time and we did NOT end up waiting 11 minutes for the bus! I did NOT get back to 2 of the 3 kids NOT dressed yet for school. We were NOT late yet again for preschool! Peyton did NOT disobey me and disrespect me when getting off the bus, throw a two year old tantrum at the park, and show total disrespect for both of us the rest of the night! NO NEVER! He did NOT drag his feet on getting to bed and I definitely did NOT finally stand my ground and say what I should have said on Monday – “If you miss the bus because you keep dragging your feet like you are now when asked to do something, you will walk into the office and tell the principal why you are late. Mommy will not pick up the pieces for you anymore!”

Thursday was all sunshine and roses! Peyton was NOT putting on his shoes at 8:18 when the bus comes at 8:19! (luckily for him, he made it!) I was NOT totally exhausted from getting up several times a night this whole week for 2 of the 4 kids! It’s like having a newborn all over again! I definitely do NOT want one of those. ;) Ahem…NO NEVER!

The grocery store trip with the 4 and 5 yr old did NOT take me 1.5 hrs and give me literally 5 min to unload the groceries before I had to be leaving to pick up the 3 yr old!

Parker usually rides the bus to school, but we get an extra half hour if I take him. So I decided to go to the park after preschool pick up and they were having so much fun I let them play till the last possible minute. That of course did NOT make me late getting Parker to school. We were definitely NOT running across the parking lot as the last kid in line was getting into school. I am mother of the year for making her 5 yr old cry because he thought he was going to miss school and get in trouble!

I did NOT find a bag full of cold food from the grocery store still in my car an hour later!

Friday was much of the same thing. Lots of being on time for school, perfectly behaved 3, 4, 5, and 9 yr old’s, art-free floors/walls, great enthusiasm over going to school….

I’m sure lots of things that did NOT happen to me over the last week were forgotten, pushed to the back of my mind to never be thought of again, in order to keep just a piece of my sanity!

On Sunday, Sept 15th I will be hosting a Corporate Event. What is that you ask? Well its a short meeting where you get to hear from some of the top leaders in the company about their success on the same products Jeff and I have been using to improve our health. You get to taste them too! 

I am super excited about this event and the lives that will be changed. There will be LOTS of FREE products being given away! Over $1,000 worth to be exact!!!!

This amazing woman, friend, and mentor has lost 80 lbs, and grown an amazing team that I am proud to be a part of. Her name is Jennifer and she will be there to share her story with all of you and how she is using these products to change her family's finances as well! She is making over $40,000/month helping people change their lives! She has earned several trips, cruises, and is now on her way to Bora Bora at the end of Sept. I too will get there one day! 

I would love for you to join us! Leave your wallet at home and just come out and hear how these products are changing lives!

I was asked to post my business story in a group that my mentor leads last week; while I always knew in the back of my head my reason for why I do this, putting it "down on paper" released a new passion and motivator for continuing to do what I do even when things aren't always easy. I was back and forth on whether to share my vulnerability with my blog and fb peeps at large, but Jeff told me to stop worrying about what other people think and to share because you never know who needs to hear it.

So here it is:

Desperate to find something to help supplement our income but hard pressed for time as a mom of 4, ages 8, 5, 4, and 2, I have been super blessed by the opportunity that Xyngular has provided for our family. My husband, Jeff wanted to lose weight and I wanted him to be happy. Back in June of 2012 we decided to change our lives and to date he has lost 65 lbs and I have lost 4. Why do I even bring up that 4 lb weight loss you ask? Well because it shows that you don’t have to have a huge weight loss story to be successful in this business. I don’t really have an overwhelmingly awesome health story either (relief from chronic back pain and some much needed energy), but I know what these products can do and have done for my family and friends and I want nothing more than to pass that gift onto others.

I am a super shy person and have had to step outside my comfort zone, reach deep inside, and share my heart out. It’s not as easy for me without a huge weight loss story, but I am not letting that get in my way. I have earned an all-expense paid trip to Utah for my husband and I, I have earned my $500 cash bonus that Sandra was talking about, as well as monthly bonuses that are helping my husband and I get out of debt!

Knowing that I work for a company that has integrity and stands behind their products, and that I am sharing something I am truly passionate about, has carried through into a successful business. 

Summertime Fun

Peyton's last day of school was on the 14th and we have been busy filling the days with the park, the pool, and a more laid back schedule. I'm exhausted already! Ha! But we are having fun!

1 year mark

1 year ago this week Jeff decided he was worth it! He chose to change for himself and for us. I couldn't be prouder of him and his determination to get healthy!

65 lbs and countless inches lost.